Sometimes I feel existential angst
When I realize I’ll never visit all the places
Which I’d like to go someday before I die
(Unlikely vacations)

Which, let’s be real, wouldn’t be realistic even were I rich
And had unlimited time and resources
A.k.a. If I didn’t work in social services
Let alone if we end up adopting kids
(Unlikely vacations)

But there are virtually no places I’d decline to go
Okay, maybe not the most uninhabitable landscapes
Like the Sahara or Marianas Trench
(Unlikely vacations)

Or the places we’d be persecuted for being gay
But pretty much anywhere else would be fair game
I’d’ve been a high maintenance recipient if I’d been selected for Make-A-Wish!
(Unlikely vacations)

Let’s see. Would it be:

Japan or Argentina
New Zealand, Laos, or India?
New Guinea or Italy
Egypt, Greece, or the Andes?
Galapagos or Easter Island
Antarctica, but when it’s summer in the Southern Hemisphere (Unlikely vacations)

Or Kenya, Madagascar
Israel, if not at war
China or the Amazon
South Korea, Vietnam
Norway, the Inside Passage
Greenland, Russia, even the Vatican!

The UK, or UAE
Each continent eventually
Et cetera, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera
Et cetera, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera! (Unlikely vacations)

Plus that’s not even counting all the spots I’ve already been
Which undoubtedly I’d someday love to see again
Like Australia, Finland, and the Yucatán
(Unlikely vacations)

Or Germany and Sweden
Nepal, Thailand, or Belgium
Can’t forget British Columbia, after the border reopens
And of course, most of the places I’ve been in the States (Unlikely vacations)

See, it’d be literally impossible within one lifetime
Unless I could continue as a ghost
Or as a digital imprint of my soul
Or if I found Jitterbug Perfume to make me immortal (Unlikely vacations)

But the most likely scenario would be past lives
Although I’m skeptical of reincarnation
But it’s fun to imagine all my past and future selves
Fulfilling my imaginary expeditions and unlikely vacations (Unlikely vacations)